3 Weeks!

Isabella you are growing right before our eyes! You are getting so big and this mamma doesn't like it. I need to find that time capsule and put you in it so you will be this small, sweet, and cuddley forever!

This week has just been a mommy-daughter bonding time. With the exception of Monday when Nana came over to "babysit" you we have spent the entire week together just me, you, and daddy when he wasn't at work. Mainly we snuggled, watched tv, napped, and occasionally did some housework.

You are now consistantly eating 3.5 ounces every 3 hours during the day. You are eating the same amount about every 5 hours at night. Mommy likes this because she can get some sleep. You are still wearing newborn diapers, which we need to buy more of (the size 1 diapers practically come up to your armpits!) And we are still struggling to find outfits that actually fit.

Here are some highlights from week #3 of your new life....

We had our first Easter with you...

You wore your first Easter dress...

You really started enjoying your baths...

You showed support for your Papa with your take on his hair-do...

You were introduced to John Deere...

You have started a really bad habit of sleeping on our chests (but you LOVE it...we can tell by your sweet smile)...

You wore your house slippers to the grocery you daring little girl you...

And you were proud of it...

Then you took over daddy's pillow...

You started playing on the floor. You like stretching out and kicking those legs...

And you found your favorite toy to play with. Roll Tide...

You of course had a photo shoot with mommy...

Watch out EPC. This mommy is getting good, but she has a wonderful prop!...

All in all week #3 with you has been great. You are a wonderful baby and an even more wonderful daughter. You still aren't a big fan of loud noises. This includes but is not limited to thunderstorms, weed eaters, and lawnmowers. Your biggest milestone of the week is that you have slept in your own bed at night!! You handled it well. Mommy took it a little harder. And well daddy...he um...slept of course.

Needless to say. If the 1,000 pictures don't prove it enough...we love you. We are so glad you joined our family. This is such a wonderful family now with you in it. I know you depend on me, but now my heart depends on you. You just make our lives so much fuller now and we are so much happier now that you are with us. Please don't grow too fast and just let us enjoy every little detail about you.

Happy Easter!

This was our first Easter with Miss Isabella. It was nice and relaxing. We went to church like we do most Sundays. I was very excited for her to wear her white dress that my boss and his wife got for her. We also used her new white afgahn that Miss Alice Nelson crocheted for her. She was the most lovely little baby in church. After church we visited Nana and Papa for lunch and then a quick trip to Great Grandmother and Great Grandaddy's house before we went home for a very uneventful afternoon. Here are a couple pictures from our day!!

Two Weeks...Not too tired

Isabella you have been with us for two weeks (and some days) now! I still don't think reality has set in that I am a mommy yet. Hopefully this next week it will really set in that you are my daughter and that you will be relying on me for all your needs. Not that I mind the visiting, but I am ready for some alone time with you. The first week you were home my mother, your Grammy Oetjen came to visit and help (and boy oh boy did she help) for a week. And this week my grandmother, your Great Grandmother Fedderke came to visit for the week. But between them visiting and everyone else wanting to stop by and see you or watch you sleep I haven't gotten any time with you alone. This may sound really selfish but it is what I need right now. I was asked if I had gotten the "baby blues" and this is my only "baby blue." I want to just snuggle with you and hold you every second you are awake. I want to look you over from head to toe. Instead of just feeding you and bathing you I want to interact with you. That's my "baby blue". Even if I haven't gotten my mommy time with you I have had some great moments with you that I want to share.

Your Aunt Sherry came to visit you again. You are always so calm in her arms. And she just really enjoys you being in her arms. (Mommy is pretty calm when you are in her arms, too.)

You and your daddy have really had some great times bonding. When he walks in the door in the evenings you just kick your legs as quick as they go. You used to kick my belly when your daddy walked in the door. And now you get just as excited on the outside.

You have met your Great Grandma Fedderke. You weren't sure about her at first, but slowly but surely you are warming up to her. (Now if she would just quit bouncing/rocking you so you would quit getting sick you may approve of her)

We have started to transition you into your crib. You are doing great. Now people just need to leave you alone and let you sleep in there so mommy and daddy can get some sleep in their bedroom.

We visited daddy at work after your doctor's appointment. Anything to cheer you up from that mean 'ole doctor.

We found out that you look great in blue. It is definately your color and daddy isn't upset that it happens to be his favorite color.

Your brothers have been really good about you being in the house now. They are still sweet little kitties, but they just keep their distance when you are crying.

You are getting more bright-eyed. Don't get me wrong you do plenty of sleeping, but in the afternoons you wake up for quite a while. Long enough for mommy to do a quick photo shoot.

And when you do sleep of course it is the most precious thing in the world!! It makes mommy melt to see you snooze. And I have to check your breathing every so often.

But it is moments like these that just make being a mommy the best job in the world. I love those little smiles. (and they really help get daddy wrapped around your finger)

I have three very memorable moments from this week.

**After putting you on your changing table half asleep you all of a sudden let out a gut wrenching scream. I couldn't understand it because you were just sleeping and I hadn't even taken your clothes off yet. Upon further inspection I noticed that you had clenched some of your hair on mistake and was pulling rather hard. I had to giggle a bit because it was just too cute. Soon enough you will realize "cause and effect" this means that you will also soon realize that you will know that if you pull your hair that it hurts. Until then I will just keep taking your hair out of your hand and kiss it to make it all better.

**Yesterday I took you outside for one of those quick photo shoots. I sat you in your favorite seat next to the flower pots by the front door. You took one big stretch and accidentally grabbed a wet mushy flower. It scared you half to death (mommy laughed, oops) After some quick snuggles we were back on track for our quick photo shoot but you were much more cautious where those little hands were going (and mommy was too).

**Tuesday after daddy went to work you were wide awake, and quite frankly I wasn't. So I propped you up on daddy's pillow and put a pillow on the other side of you so you wouldn't roll off the bed. You snuggled into his spot just nicely and sound asleep we went. It was a great moment for my heart (and my sleepiness). Now I know I will catch flack for letting you sleep in bed with me but my disclaimer is that you were surrounded by pillows and that all precautions were taken. So all you mommy police just sit back down.

Isabella mommy loves you and I want the best for you. I am looking forward to this next week and all the cute moments we will have together. Quit growing so fast so I can soak it all in before it is too late.

Isabella Faye - 1 Week

Oh my goodness. Did I just really write that title. One week old. Isabella has been with us for one week. I have been a mommy for one week. Matthew has been a daddy for one week. That is crazy to think. It is still sinking in that I am a mommy. But it really has been the best week of my life. I wouldn't have changed anything if I had too. We have had a great week of first's:

 

Our First Labor

 Our First Birth

Our Fist Exeperience In the NICU

Daddy's First Touch

Mommy's First Touch

Mommy's First Snuggle

Daddy's First Snuggle

Isabella's First Bottle

First Outfit

First Time Meeting Great Grandmom

First Time With Nanna Nancy

First Cuddle From Uncle Andrew

First Time Out of the Hospital

First Few Moments At Home

First Time Meeting Great Granddad

First Cuddles from Pappa Bobby

First Trip To Church

First Visit to Nanna and Pappa Hughes

First Visit from Grammy

And my favorite moment from the week...

The Most Lovely First Smiles

(sorry I don't know why I can't get it to upload in the right direction)

This week has gone by so fast. I have really loved every minute of it. I just wish it would slow down. Tomorrow Matthew goes back to work. It is really sad and scarey all at the same time. Matthew and Isabella have such a great bond. Her eyes just light up when he talks and she looks around to find him. It is so special in this mommy's eyes to see how great of a father Matthew is. It also helps that he helps out so much. My mom is here to help, but it just isn't the same as the teamwork Matthew and I have together.

Isabella I don't want to foget:

• How full and soft your hair is. I love just rubbing it on my cheek.
• How much you look like daddy. You look even more like daddy with your crooked little smile. (ahh it just makes me melt)
• Your little hands and how you like to touch EVERYTHING. Your hair, your clothes, your face, our faces, my hair. 
• The screams you make when you have your diaper changed. I know it should make me feel bad, but your whimper is just too darn cute. 
• Your sweet smell. I have never smelled anything more sweet. I just want to eat you up.
• That the 0-3 month clothes that I thought were just a waste of money because you would probably wear once, swallow you whole. I know you will grow into them, but I don't want you to. Just stay small, please. 
• Your love/hate relationship with being swaddled. You absolutely love being swaddled, but you REALLY hate sitting still to have it done.
• How much I love you and how great of a gift you are from God. God loves me. I have always known that God loves me, but Isabella is just the ultimate gift and confirmation of his love.

Your favorite things:

• Your pink seat. It snuggles you in all the right places.
• Getting all lotioned up after your bath. It is the only time you lay still while you are nakey.
• Daddy's voice. Your face just lights up when he is in the room.

Isabella your mommy and daddy love you very much and we always will.

  

A long 15 hours...An even longer 24 hours!

On Monday April 4, I had a doctors appointment. Matthew and I had been told the week before that due to my current condition that this appointment would determine if we would continue with the pregnancy or if we were going to induce. Due to my continued high blood pressure the decision was made to induce the next morning. We hurried home to prepare as best as we could for the next day's events but nothing could prepare us for what we went through.
We arrived promptly at 5 a.m. as instructed by my doctor. After getting checked in and loaded up with information and IV's the doctor came and broke my water at 8a.m. I already had a very steady contraction pattern but they started pitocin to increase the intensity. The downfall of this plan is that with the increased intensity (and pain) my blood pressure was going to increase. And sure enough by noon my blood pressure was getting to an unsafe level, but I was only dialated to 4 c.m. Instead of beginning a medicine to control my blood pressue (which I have been told is aweful) I made the decision to abandon my "all natural" ship and opt in for a good ole epidural. The epidural kept my blood pressue down for quite sometime, however by 6 p.m. (and only 6c.m. dialated) my blood pressure was becoming a problem again. Not only was my blood pressue a problem but I had started to have a fever. These are two very bad signs during labor. The nurse had even told Matthew not to leave and eat dinner because she thought a C-section was in the near future. After a dose of Tylenol, a full bag of fluids, my second round of antibiotics, and four (yes FOUR) hours of laying flat on my back I was 10 c.m. dialated. The unfortunate thing was that my doctor was not even at the hospital!! What?! The nurse said, "don't sneeze or cough or she is going to come out!" Finally, around 10:30p.m. my doctor walked in and my nurse started commanding me to push during my next contraction. Five pushes, through three contractions later Isabella Faye Hughes was brought into this world. She was born April 05, 2011 at 11:00 p.m. She weighed 5lbs. 14.2oz. and 18" long.

Five minutes later, the situation was not so exciting. She wasn't as pink, and breathing was really hard for her. Then before Matthew and I could blink, the NICU team came and swept her away. Doctors and nurses continued to reassure us that everything was okay. As much as you want to believe them, you just worry in every inch of your body. What made matters worse is that due to my fever I was now quarrantined from seeing her for 24 hours from the time I became fever free. Are you kidding me?! I can't see my own daughter! This is a joke! I have carried this baby for 9 months and now you are just going to keep her locked away in a little room and let only my husband and other family members see her?! How do you know that they don't have a fever?!

The first night was rough on Isabella. She had to have CPAP to help reinforce to her that breathing was a good idea. It was also helping her breathe easier without having to work so hard to maintain her oxygen saturation. Matthew finally got to see her around 1a.m. and he took pictures for me to see. She looked rough but it made it a reality for me that she needs some extra attention and love. (Like the love from her mommy that is being kept from her for 24 hours, OMG how am I ever going to make it 21 more hours away from her!!)

The next day we had many visitors. Isabella had to be seen by the neonatologist who gave her a very good outlook. She was removed from oxygen and was told to work on her feedings. Matthew kept me updated with fresh videos and pictures every few hours. This helped me maintain some type of sanity while I counted down the time.

Nana Nancy, Papa Bobby, Uncle Andrew, Uncle Andrew, Robert, and Aunt Sherry came by to visit. It was nice to have some company to keep me preoccupied until 12:15 a.m. Not to metion that I just continued to look at my precious little girl in all the pictures and videos that came back from the NICU.

FINALLY at 12:15 (and no later) I was running down the hallway to see her. I couldn't get scrubbed in fast enough and through that door. I just wanted to touch her skin and feel her soft hair and just soak in everything that I had missed in the past 24 hours. It seemed like I had missed 24 days...no weeks...no years. I just wanted to take in every detail of her. I already could tell she looked so much like Matthew. I don't mind one bit that she looks like him. The nurses are just amazed at how much her and Matthew look alike. Here are my thoughts: She has the most silky soft brown thick hair (no suprise), she has long, gorgeous eyelashes just like daddy (yea!), her chin is definately all daddy, she has my long legs, funky toes and the most obvious is the resemblence of my chubby cheeks.

Oh how I still long to hold her. It killed me to leave her in the NICU alone again tonight. I feel like a terrible mother that has just thrown her child into a pack of wolves. I hated it. I cried when I thought about leaving her, then I cried all the way down the hall and for quite a while when I got back to my room and now I am crying again. Hopefully, she will be strong enough that she will be able to handle mommy holding her tomorrow. I REALLY hope so atleast. I know I will probably leave the hospital without her. And for now I have settled into this reality, but I love my daughter and I just want what is best for her. I know that His hands will help guide all of us through this first little speed bump.